Bernie Sanders made his “surprise” appearance on Saturday Night Live and it surprisingly wasn’t in the Bern Your Enthusiasm sketch. Instead, we’re taken back to a steam ship in the Atlantic Ocean and placed in what seems like a Titanic situation. The ship is sinking and it’s women and children first, much to the chagrin of Larry David. He’s essentially calling out every person they let on a lifeboat before him, calling for kids to have pube checks, asking if an old lady is menopausal, and calling another kid a midget in disguise — he can say it, it’s olden times.

But then he makes the mistake of bringing up the fact that he’s rich and he’s about to pop down in a lifeboat to save his hide. This, much like the Bat Signal, calls Bernie Sanderswitzky to the scene to take on the rich jerk. He’s also hoping to change his name once he gets to America, so it doesn’t sound so Jewish.

It’s a fine appearance, mostly because Sanders just gets to spout some of his campaign points and doesn’t have to do much actual acting — though he is funny. The best part is definitely the ending with Sanders asking David if he wants to share a cab, and Olden David turning him down. Time travel for next season of Curb? I’d watch it.

(Via NBC)

Now Watch: How Much Is Larry David Like His Character on ‘Curb Your Enthusiasm’?

Larry David’s monologue ahead of SNL wasn’t some sort of protest or anti-version of your typical monologue. Instead, it was the anti-monologue because this is Larry David. He’s not going to go out and praise himself like a normal guest, he’s not going to sign and dance, and he’s certainly not going to place some sort of unrealistic goal on the show. We have a great show? Don’t even try it.

David spends close to 5 minutes riffing on the differences between schmucks and pricks, why he’s more of a guest than an actual host, and Jewish kids with eating disorders. If you aren’t picturing Frank and Estelle Costanza during the shouting session about the brisket, you need to spend some time watching old Seinfeld episodes.

The real highlight is introducing the band, The 1975, by parlaying it into a masturbation joke. It’s the year David broke his own personal record with 412 times. That’s not just a minor slip off your throne as “master of your domain,” that’s taking the throne and burning it outside because you’re too busy locking yourself in your masturbatorium. This could be a closet like Billy Madison, a plain white room with some nice music and flowers, or the scruffy bathroom at the gas station down the street. Not the cleanest, but it adds to the character of the moment.

(Via SNL)

Now Watch: How Much Is Larry David Like His Character on ‘Curb Your Enthusiasm’?

If you remember back to Super Bowl 49, SNL had a fun lead in to aid the game’s appearance on NBC. And part of it was an ad for Totinos Pizza Rolls and the Totino’s Activity Pack For Women. Some took it to be a moment that highlighted the problem of women in television ads, especially during the Super Bowl. Others took it as a slam against Totinos, a fine company that doesn’t deserve to be smacked in the mouth during a late night sketch. But either way, it was one of the more memorable sketches from J.K. Simmons’ episode.

This year we return to Vanessa Bayer’s housewife, cooking up some Totinos rolls for her boys during “The Big Game.” And this all seems like it’s moving along the same track as last year, until you realize there’s nothing on the TV. Then it’s horror for Bayer and it goes from being an ad for Totinos to being a fight for her life to being another ad for the revival of The X-Files. Also Larry David is tossed in as a hungry football fan, something that should’ve been our first indication that something was wrong.

If black eyed alien trance freaks aren’t into Totinos pizza rolls, what kind of life are they even living? Seems a little messed up. Also seems like they better start putting a knife in that activity kit.

NBC

This was Larry David’s first time hosting Saturday Night Live, which somehow sounds right and wrong at the same time. (It’s also the first time anyone named Larry has hosted. Poor Larry Storch and Larry Hagman never got their shot.) It’s kind of a shame David hasn’t hosted until now, because he seems like someone who should be at least a five-timer by now. Anyway, whatever, it took until SNL’s 41st season for David to embrace the show and, well, better late then never.

As an aside, yes, for the first time in the six years I’ve been writing SNL Scorecard, I missed the previous episode. I was covering Sundance and had a conflict during the show. By the time I saw the Ronda Rousey show, it seemed a little late to write a full post about it. But, for the sake of the ongoing season scoring, here are the results, if interested. (If not, then just keep scrolling.)

“Screen Guild Awards”
Score: 9.0

“Weekend Update”
Score: 6.5

“At the Club”
Score: 6.0

“Super Crew”
Score: 5.5

“Love Struck”
Score: 5.0

“Cold Open: Palin Endorsement”
Score: 5.0

“Football Party”
Score: 4.5

“City Council”
Score: 4.0

“Ronda Rousey Monologue”
Score: 4.0

“Teacher Trial”
Score: 4.0

“Bland Man”
Score: 2.5

Total: 5.09

Okay, now that that’s out of the way, we’re back … and off we go to this week’s Scorecard:

Sketch of the Night

“FBI Simulator” (Strong, David, Thompson, Ensemble) How in the world is this sketch called “FBI Simulator” and not “The Future Recurring Sketch We Have To See At Least Five Times Starring Larry David As Kevin Roberts.” Honestly, if I read that Larry David had turned down the chance to do another season of Curb Your Enthusiasm to instead make a 13-episode season of Kevin Roberts, I’d be okay with that. Wait, not only would I be okay with that, I’d bingewatch the Kevin Roberts show immediately.

Score: 9.5

The Good

“Bern Your Enthusiasm” (David, Ensemble) When you think about the fact that this was only conceived, written, filmed, edited and aired in a grand total of five days, that makes it all the more remarkable. This is just a really well done piece of comedy that actually uses a real-life, just-happened event as the crux of the entire story as opposed to shoehorning it in. We knew David would be playing Bernie Sanders, but this is a real story with a real narrative and real consequences.

Score: 9.5

“Peyton and Cam” (Thompson, Killam, Moynihan, Bennett) You know, SNL likes to claim they never have the “save the world with comedy” sensibilities that, say, a show like Studio 60 liked to pretend sketch comedy writers had. For the most part, I believe they don’t. For the most part, a funny fart joke is a funny fart joke. But every once in a while, along comes a simple sketch about two guys singing a 34-year-old song that encapsulates a lot of things that are wrong about racial injustice, the NFL, and the different standards people have to live by based on who they are. Anyway, sometimes a sketch about social commentary can be a really great sketch about social commentary.

Score: 8.0

“Totinos” (Bayer, David, Ensemble) This was so delightfully weird! Actually, it wasn’t just weird, it really did work as a horror film. It really was a bit frightening.

Score: 7.8

“Last Call” (McKinnon, David, Thompson) Would these sketches even work without Kenan Thompson? Well, probably. But we are all Kenan Thompson when we watch this sketch. And, boy, how fun is it to see Larry David break down and look like he’s having the time of his life. I mean, even Larry David couldn’t keep a straight face.

Score: 7.2

“Weekend Update” (Jost, Che, McKinnon, Rudnitsky, Stiller, Wilson) Jost and Che continue to become more playful with each other, which is a good thing. Forever we heard about “the chemistry” between these two, but now we are seeing it on a consistent basis. Also, the fact “Weekend Update” could basically call an audible and do a whole segment about the Republican debate is remarkable and great to see happen. SNL may be live, but it’s still a heavily scripted show. To add something in like that at the last minute is not an easy thing to do.

Kate McKinnon’s “Sturdy Barbie” is a really great idea and really well done. Jon Rudnitsky came on and made jokes about how no one know he’s on SNL, which was basically what Brooks Wheelan used to do, which is not a great sign. (I was kind of enjoying his Dirty Dancing routine until he started added his own wacky narrative, which all just seemed way too rehearsed as “a bit.”) And then Ben Stiller and Owen Wilson showed up to promote a movie.

Score: 7.0

“Songwriting Class” (Davidson, David, Bayer, McKinnon, Killam, Pharoah) This was nice for a couple of reasons: It was nice to see Pete Davidson star in a sketch in which he’s not playing the victim of a sexual assault. Also, it’s always nice to see sketches that work today just as well as they would have worked in 1975. It’s just a good example of sketch comedy.

Score: 6.8

“Larry David Monologue” (David) No one does a better Larry David impression that Larry David.

Score: 6.0

The Bad

“Steam Ship” (David, Sanders, Ensemble) As far as shoehorned cameos go, this was one of the better ones. And I give SNL credit for not doing yet another “SNL character meets the real life version” segment because those just never quite work out like people hope they will. (And effectively defang the character in the process. I think politicians have figured this out and now want to meet their SNL counterpart.)

Score: 5.0

“Cold Open: Message From Ted Cruz” (Killam, McKinnon) I wrote about this last week, but I still don’t understand why Killam isn’t playing Rubio. For whatever reason, they are really trying to force this home that Taran Killam is Ted Cruz now. And now, after Saturday night’s GOP debate, Rubio has a comedic angle. He’s the robot! Taran would be amazing playing “Robot Rubio.” (I’m thinking of that carnival ride, animatronic character he did with Jim Carrey.) The thing is, this sketch was pretty well written, but there’s just a disconnect between this handsome man telling me how unattractive he is and, well, what I’m looking at. (I’ve always been an admirer of Killam’s work, but this just isn’t the best fit.)

Score: 4.0

The Ugly

NA

Average Score for this Show: 7.08

· Tracy Morgan 7.12
· Larry David 7.08
· Elizabeth Banks 6.98
· Amy Schumer 6.53
· Chris Hemsworth 6.35
· Ryan Gosling 6.07
· Adam Driver 5.98
· Tina Fey and Amy Poehler 5.90
· Matthew McConaughey 5.78
· Miley Cyrus 5.41
· Ronda Rousey 5.09
· Donald Trump 4.48

HBO

No episode of Curb Your Enthusiasm would be complete if Larry didn’t flip out at some minor injustice in his cushy life. The idea that somebody as comfortable and privileged as a “rich prick” like Larry David can still boil over with anger at the most trivial of things is what carried Curb through its eight seasons.

We’ve looked at Larry’s battles with Susie Green (even on the campaign trail) and his most outrageous, yet hilarious moments, but what about his all-out yelling matches? No one is better at losing his cool and yelling like a wild man than Larry David, and no one is more of a hero to everyone who stifles their own want to let their words flow freely and loudly at a stupid situation or a stupid person. So, to celebrate all that hilarious (and inspirational) anger, here are some of the many times Larry David unleashed his fury on Curb Your Enthusiasm (which you can stream on HBO Now).

Yamaka alert.

HBO

The penis may not care about race, creed or color, but Marty Funkhouser (Bob Einstein) sure does and takes issue with Larry sleeping with a woman who takes liberty in bashing Judaism during sex. Larry doesn’t exactly keep things kosher, though, and flips out when Marty tells him he can’t play in a golf tournament because it falls on the Sabbath. The whole scene boils over when Marty drops his Yamaka and Larry proceeds to mock him. The whole thing kinda makes you wonder why they’re even friends to begin with.

Nobody likes a tattle-tale.

HBO

Tattle-taling is a cardinal sin in Larry David’s book, and he’s not about to let some punk like Vance rat him out to Susie (Susie Essman). After he and Jeff pigged out on the Pinkberry that was meant for Susie’s dying dog, Vance threatens to rat on Larry to Susie. As Larry puts it, “nobody likes tattle-tales” and condemns Vance to an eternity in hell if he tattles — which of course he does.

Larry’s beautiful colon.

HBO

One of the things that makes Curb so great is how angry Larry gets about the smallest of issues. After he hires Richard’s girlfriend as a receptionist, he immediately regrets the decision when she attempts to make small talk with him after each of his many bathroom visits. It all finally boils over when he mentions it to Richard who calls him out on his bowel and bladder issues. Nobody calls out Larry David. The take away line: “What are you eating, a lot of grains and nuts? You’re like a Jew squirrel.”

Larry calls out Parkinson’s.

HBO

After Larry’s shirt is ruined by the exploding can of soda given to him by Michael J. Fox, he becomes suspicious that Fox is using Parkinson’s as a cover for his malicious behavior. Of course, Larry is unable to prove this, but revels in an opportunity to take his frustration out on Fox’s doorman.

Big Dog’s days are over.

HBO

“You never give up a cabinet. Never give up a cabinet.” If only Larry had Jeff’s wisdom, he could have avoided a confrontation with Dino, also known as Big Dog (Harry Hamlin). Normally, Larry is completely in the wrong, but in this season eight episode, he’s actually got a point when Dog pisses all over Larry’s office territory by taking two cabinets. Screw Dog’s pudding and chocolate pretzels, once he pushed Larry into one cabinet, it was total warfare with Larry unleashing one of the show’s best rants on Big Dog.

Larry ruins the tooth fairy.

HBO

We covered this confrontation with Susie back in our look at Larry vs. Susie, but it’s too great not to include here, as well. It’s well-known that nobody pisses off Susie more than Larry, and when he ruins the tooth fairy for her daughter with his squeaky shoes, she rattles off a string of profanity that would make anyone blush. Not one to stand by and take it, Larry seizes the opportunity to give Susie a reality check and remind her that “there is no f*cking tooth fairy!”

Larry tells Sammi to “shut the f*ck up.”

HBO

I almost feel bad for Larry in this scenario, simply because of the wrath he brings upon himself for yelling at Susie’s daughter. Over the course of the series, Larry slowly chips away at Sammi’s childhood, this time telling her to “shut the f*ck up” after her singing wakes him up. He, of course, regrets this decision within seconds when Susie barges in the bedroom like a mamma grizzly bear, demanding he get out of her house.

Larry refuses to take the blame.

HBO

“Give her an ultimatum! What the f*ck was that?! I was this close! This close! She’s gone!” — Larry.

After Larry gives Cheryl an ultimatum on the advice of his marriage counselor (Steve Coogan), it backfires. Rather than attempt to fix things with Cheryl on his own, he demands his counselor come with him to take not “90% of the blame, but 100% of the lion’s share.” This doesn’t exactly go smoothly, either, with the counselor claiming responsibility for the “new Larry.” As much as Larry is often wrong and overreacts, you can’t say that the guy is ever a pushover.

Larry demands half the candy.

HBO

Larry David isn’t the kind of person who’s amused by magic tricks, and he’s certainly not about to pretend to be entertained by one from a “phony” kid magician. Yes, Larry isn’t screaming here, but that’s only because he doesn’t want another adult to hear the verbal threat of “I want half that candy” going down.

A battle of silent “f*ck yous.”

HBO

Larry’s so brilliant at screaming that he can pantomime a screaming match and still come out on top. He got off on the wrong foot with Richard Lewis’ girlfriend and her “special breasts” at the movie theater and things never really recovered. The two enemies then engaged in a silent battle of “f*ck yous!” with Richard oblivious to the fight going on behind him. Truly something only a master prick, like Larry, could pull off.

It’s safe to say that Larry David hosting SNL was pretty, pretty good idea. You’ll also never have to hear that for a while, so rejoice. But we need to relive Saturday night one more time because David is hilarious and Kevin Roberts is still the “coolest b*tch in town.” That’s likely why this rehearsal footage was shared online. You can’t resist.

And the best part is that David clearly enjoyed himself too. He becomes Roberts and almost explodes in the process. When you see his face match his amazing orange suit, you know it’s peak joy for everybody involved. That or it’s hell and the only way to deal with it is laughter. It’s actually the look of pain on David’s face.

If you missed the original sketch, take a look below and read the scorecard take on it over here. It’s definitely one of the better sketches of the night and it’s a shame they didn’t put it on the lame old YouTube channel. But the rehearsal makes up for it just a bit. Get that b*tch a donut and get on board the Roberts train for a ride, likely to the worst part of town and soaked in Brut.

Now Watch: Is Larry David The King Of Cameos?

HBO

Listen, the bestsellers are a lie: Trying not to sweat the small stuff is fine, but sometimes you just need to recognize that even the smallest, most minute little bothers are excruciating and awful. And even though the more enlightened among us (ugh, those people, am I right?) say you need to let go and let someone — maybe close your eyes and take a few deep breaths? — have a slice of your cranky-assed and shouty rage. Because, there are times when letting go just isn’t an option. It just isn’t. Deal with it.

No one knows this more than Larry David who, if you took a poll, would probably end up number one on a list of people who sweat the small stuff, don’t let things go, and plan petty revenge in their spare time. Or, at least, that’s what his alter-ego, George Costanza, did on Seinfeld and what David did in his “comedically exaggerated” self-portrayal in Curb Your Enthusiasm (which is available to stream on HBO Now). And you know what? That’s fine. Sometimes you just need to accept that the world is a place full of people who are out to inconvenience you in ways you never thought possible. And if you’re going to let the things get to you, do it like David: hilariously, unapologetically, and without fear. So, with all that said, here are just a few moments that demonstrate that there are times when kicking and screaming may be just what you need to do. Especially when Michael J. Fox, that lovable bastard, is totally out to get you.

Larry: He insulted me. He implied that I was lying about my stepfather!

Jeff Greene: You don’t have a stepfather.

Larry: I know, but I didn’t like the implication!

HBO

There’s an unspoken rule when someone’s telling a small lie, and that’s that you don’t call them on it. It’s because we live in a society and people can say whatever they want and, as long as it’s not hurting anyone, adults shouldn’t call each other out on their bullsh*t. When they do, though, like when Larry was called out for lying about having a stepfather, the person being called out has the absolute right to be righteously indignant. Even when they’re in the wrong. Especially when they’re wrong! That’s how life should work!

“I’m yelling for society! For everybody!”

HBO

When Larry catches a woman (Michaela Watkins) not curbing her dog because she doesn’t have a bag, he decides it’s time to take a stand. Not just for himself, of course, but for every person who’s had to step in a pile of doggie droppings because owners were just “forgetful” or “ran out.” Is it petty to yell at someone on the street? Sure. But what happens when you don’t? That’s right: total anarchy. You can’t just let these things go.

“I think you’re upset about the shushing, I think you were pissed off about the Hitler mustache I drew on your father-in-law, I think you shook up that can of soda on purpose, and I think you’re clomping now and you made up some bullsh*t excuse about your feet, all under the guise of Parkinson’s, that’s what I think!”

HBO

Just because you’re paranoid doesn’t mean the world isn’t out to get you. And Larry learned that the hard way when his upstairs neighbor, the diabolical Michael J. Fox, made his life a living hell with his stomping and his pushing and his shaken cans of soda. So, what did Larry do? He let the guy have it. Just like so many of us wish we could with our neighbors, co-workers, and even the people we call our friends. Unfortunately, however, it didn’t end up too well for him. Larry actually had to get out of Dodge for months after his altercations with Fox — but, at least, he let it all out. And isn’t that what’s really important? No?

“We’re fighting because you’re a moron.”

HBO

Actually, one hundred percent of fights happen because the other person is a moron. It’s a verified fact, and if you don’t want your glasses crushed by a too-tight hug then you shouldn’t keep them around your neck on that smug little chain. That’ll teach you to pay $219 for a pair of spectacles that you don’t even wear all the time. Send an invoice, Larry will tell you that the lesson the guy with the crushed glasses learned was priceless. (And then, of course, he’ll pee all over that invoice.)

“Nobody likes a tattle-tale, Nobody! So, go ahead and squeal and you’ll end up in Hell! Okay!”

HBO

A big part of sweating the small stuff — and it’s all small stuff (TM) — is not letting even those that have taken a vow of silence off the hook for trying to be honest. And you know what? No one does like a tattletale. Is Larry’s threat idle? Absolutely (although a repertoire of idle threats is necessary when choosing to call people out on even the tiniest problems), but who wants to risk hell to find out if that’s where tattle-tales are actually sent?

“You know anything about changing a tire? Wanna help me change a tire here? No? I could use a little help. I need a little assistance. I never took a shop class, and I need a little help. Okay, I’m just coming flat out and saying ‘help me’. Anybody want to help a semi-retarded individual change a tire? $25, $30. $30 to change this tire. $35 to change this tire right now.”

“I’ll give you $10 for a verbal response. $10. Anybody want to make $10 and respond verbally? No?”

HBO

Always remember to hold strangers to the same high standards which you wouldn’t ever hold yourself. Would Larry help someone change their tire? Hell no. But that doesn’t mean he doesn’t have a right to rage at every self-entitled passersby who refuses to help him when he’s just out there, helpless in the street. And next time this happens to you, you shouldn’t fight your desire to rage, either. It’s not like anyone’s going to pay attention (and it’s something to do while you wait three hours for the auto club to show up and charge you $4,000 for a tow).

“They could, at least, lie to us. You know, call us and lie! We don’t want to sit here like schmucks. A lie is a gesture, it’s a courtesy, it’s a little respect. This is very disrespectful.”

HBO

People, right? The least one can do is fake a sickness when they’re not going to call you up and invite you to an event they already invited you to. And even when it’s a misunderstanding, being like Larry means getting all worked up instead of waiting for a reasonable explanation. Doing this too often will really raise your blood pressure, but we all know how annoying it is when someone says they’ll call and then never does. How many times is that going to happen before there’s an actual revolution on our hands?

Hugh Mellon: Larry!
Larry: Hugh!
Hugh Mellon: Tell me you’re enjoyin’ yourself!
Larry: No!
Hugh Mellon: Glad you could make it.

HBO

The more you tell people how you really feel, the more they’ll stop inviting you to things. It’s depressing in the short-term, but think about how many bullsh*t small-talk interactions you’ll be able to avoid? Of course, they might think your honesty is refreshing and invite you to even more stupid parties where you’ll have even more chances to tell people how you really feel. Lather, rinse, repeat until you either have zero friends (and therefore no problems) or enough that it doesn’t matter how many people you piss off, someone will still show up to your funeral.

“The whole cashew-raisin balance is askew!”

HBO

Sweating the small stuff means being okay with being petty. If you’re paying for a cashew-raisin blend, you’d better be getting one. And if you’re not, you need to write a strongly worded letter to David Schwimmer’s father and demand your money back. Who does he think he is, fleecing you like that? Four cashews? That’s a travesty! (This, of course, applies to all other goods and services as well.)

“He doesn’t have a wife and his parents are dead!”

HBO

When Richard Lewis confronts Larry about stealing his phone message, Larry does the only thing that’s reasonable in a sensitive situation such as this: he mocks Lewis’ confirmed bachelorhood and dead parents. Why? Because Lewis is sweating the small stuff by forcing Larry to change his outgoing voicemail. And that may be the biggest lesson in all of this: Don’t let other people sweating the small stuff get in the way of you sweating yours. And if they try, hit them where it really hurts–in the dead parents department.

Bernie Sanders candidacy has been a godsend for SNL because they keep getting the chance to invite Larry David back on the show. Having a guy like David around to sub in for a bit part in a sketch helps to elevate it to a watchable level. Also he’s not bad at performing as Bernie Sanders.

Here he trades the cold open with Darrell Hammond’s Donald Trump getting the support of Jay Pharoah’s Ben Carson. It’s fun, it plays up Bernie being old, Trump’s alleged racism, and Ben Carson’s rough upbringing. There’s even an appearance by a steak playing a Trump steak. You can tell it’s not one of the real Trump steaks because it isn’t vacuum sealed, thawed, or attempting to assimilate the rest of the organic material around it.

But David is the highlight here and he even shows up a bit later to introduce Ariana Grande during her musical act. Or he tried to. David just couldn’t seem to get the name out of his mouth and instead of attempting to pause to correct himself, he decided to just say f*ck it and walk off.

It makes perfect sense for the live show, it isn’t exactly a wild moment, but it’s still great because Larry David is involved. The only way it’d be better is if David didn’t even attempt to say the name at all, shrugged, and then pointed to the stage.

NBC

While many wait and wonder if Curb Your Enthusiasm will ever return, show creator and star Larry David has found a semi-regular outlet for his comedic impulses by playing Democratic Presidential candidate Bernie Sanders on Saturday Night Live, the show where David’s career was almost smothered to death in its crib when he worked as a writer during the 1984-85 season.

Before David’s initial SNL experience, however, he stood out on Fridays, an SNL replica that ran from 1980 to 1982 on ABC. David worked as a writer and a performer on the show, and it was there that he first teamed up with future Seinfeld cast member Michael Richards and several future Seinfeld writers, including Larry Charles. Fridays isn’t as celebrated as SNL, having fallen into relative obscurity while SNL has charged through season after season. (This has been helped by David’s supposed objection to full a DVD release prior to the 2013 Shout! Factory Best Of compilation.) But Fridays had its time in the sun, as evidenced by the supposed actions of SNL executive producer Dick Ebersol who, according to writer and biographer Dennis Perrin, tried to peel away cast members and woo them to SNL in the time between Lorne Michaels’ stints running the show. It’s not known if David was one of those who Ebersol sought, but he eventually brought the cantankerous comic into the fold. The honeymoon, however, proved short-lived.

According to former SNL head writer Bob Tischler in the 2002 Saturday Night Live oral history Live from New York, David and Ebersol’s relationship was “horrible” and it was “almost a personal thing.” According to David’s own interview in Live from New York, much of the animosity seems to have come from a confrontation that he had with Ebersol over the show’s legendarily grueling marathon writing sessions, which David didn’t feel the need to participate in after completing his work early. According to Julia Louis-Dreyfus’ remarks in the book, David and Ebersol’s feud almost turned physical. It wasn’t just Ebersol with whom David failed to get along, though, per his comments in this 1998 interview with The A.V. Club:

“I had an office that faced the elevator, and hordes of people would go out to lunch, and my door would be open, and I would be sitting there looking at them, and I’m waiting for the wave of, “Come on, Lar, we’re going to lunch! Come on with us! You want to have lunch with us?” No. It was the only place I ever worked where I really, truly did not make a friend. I couldn’t believe it.”

More than a sense of loneliness, though, it’s clear that David felt creatively stifled. Though it’s often been said by David and others that he only got one sketch on the air in his one year, the number is slightly higher thanks to a character that he and then-cast member Billy Crystal co-created called Lou Goldman, an “old crazy Jewish weatherman” who recurred on the show.

Still, going from being a key contributor on Fridays to an afterthought on SNL couldn’t have sat well with David, especially because his material had a habit of making it through the gantlet only to get cut after dress rehearsal. This led David to quit SNL early on.

From David’s 2015 interview with Howard Stern:

“One night before the show, another sketch of mine was cut. At 11:25, five minutes before the show was to start, I had enough. […]

Dick was sitting in the chair, the director’s chair, and he had headphones on and I marched over to him and I said, “This f*cking show stinks! It stinks! It’s sh*t! I’m done! I’m gone! F*ck this! I’m out!” […]

I’m walking home in the freezing cold — couldn’t get a cab — and I’m starting to compute how much money I cost myself.”

According to David, it was his neighbor, Kenny Kramer (a.k.a. the real Kramer), who suggested that he go back two days later on a Monday and pretend that the tantrum hadn’t occurred — a scam that worked and a story that should sound familiar to Seinfeld fans. In the season two episode, “The Revenge,” George (Larry David’s avatar) walks out on his boss before trying to sneak back into the office without addressing his tantrum in the hopes that he can keep his job.

In fact, though David’s sketches rarely made it onto the air, several concepts were later developed into Seinfeld episodes, including the idea of debating the merits of someone getting to sit on a stool while doing their job in the seventh season episode, “The Maestro,” a concept that which was lifted from one of the few sketches that David got on the air. George’s effort to get an answering machine tape from his girlfriend’s apartment to delete an ill-advised message in “The Phone Message” episode of Seinfeld was also born from a failed SNL sketch, according to writer Andy Breckman’s Live from New York interview.

It’s fun to contemplate what would have happened had David been given an environment more accepting of his observational humor and distaste for the cliché and a boss who didn’t make him walk away into a cloud of obscenities. But while that’s a fun exercise, it’s also worth remembering that David was one of many names thrown against the wall in that 1984-85 super season that tried to move on from the Eddie Murphy era with the likes of Crystal, Christopher Guest, Harry Shearer, Rich Hall, and Martin Short with mixed results.

Following that season, Ebersol left and Lorne Michaels arrived on his white horse to clean house, provide structure, and save the show from cancellation. It’s almost impossible to think that David would have survived that purge. So, if you consider the hypothetical of a Larry David launched out into the world with a song in his heart and success in his rearview versus one filled with the kind of anger that seems to drive his best work and the kind of creative rebelliousness that can only come from being held down, it’s clear we all came out ahead. That includes David, who’s finally getting the last laugh at the right moment.

CBS

Aaron Sorkin is making the publicity rounds for his new movie, Molly’s Game. As a result, he’s game to talk about his past projects, including what it was like to leave The West Wing, and have famous grump Larry David give him advice about how traumatic it would be.

As Sorkin tells the Hollywood Reporter, when NBC announced that he was leaving the show, David called him within an hour, and told him emphatically to never watch the show again:

Now, Larry David had left Seinfeld a couple seasons before it ended, and Larry David said, “Listen, whatever you do, you can’t ever watch the show again, because either it’s going to be great and you’re going to be miserable, or it’s going to be less than great, and you’re going to be miserable. Either way, you’re going to be miserable.” And I thought, well, it’s Larry, he’s professionally miserable.

So, Sorkin didn’t believe the Seinfeld creator, basically, and just like when you don’t listen when your friend tells you not to be friends with your ex, it was to his detriment. When he watched the new season, this is what happened:

And I put it in my VCR, which, again, was how we watched things, and I don’t think 15 or 20 seconds went by before I — this is not an exaggeration — I go to the TV and slammed it off. It was like watching somebody make out with my girlfriend.

Looks like Larry David is good for more than impeccable curmudgeonly humor and Bernie Sanders impressions.

(via The Hollywood Reporter)

Yung Jake doesn’t want to break the Internet. But sometimes it feels like he’s trying to.

He released a mind-melting, awe-inspiring interactive HTML5 music video in 2012 called “E.m-bed.de/d.” The video uses pop-up windows to take over your screen, aping the look and feel of a normal browser viewing YouTube, with insane reactions generated at random, based on line-cursor placement. If you’re having trouble imagining what the video looks like, well, don’t feel bad, because E.m-bed.de/d is almost impossible to explain.

In fact, that’s kind of the point.

LA Weekly said that the video “satirizes viral culture.” That description makes sense, but is lacking both in intent and perspective. Yung Jake wasn’t trying to make a statement about the Internet with E.m-bed.de/d, he was just playing with the Internet, he was using the Internet as a pallet, he was doing something that we’ve never seen before.

“I think it’s not like anything people have seen before,” Jake said. “I think the point in making it is showing people you don’t have to do things in a normal way.”

And, if anything is certain about Yung Jake, it’s that he doesn’t do things the “normal way.” In fact, Jake refused to communicate in any form other than text messages during a recent interview with Complex Magazine, even though Jake and the interviewer were in the same room.

Some people would call that a performance, and maybe they’re right. Jake’s text messaging could be an adopted affectation, but, if it is, it’s one he’s extremely committed to. Yung Jake is making art out of youth culture—out of the culture of the Internet—and it just might be the exact direction that modern art needs to evolve.

“Until I hung out with Jake, I didn’t think I would understand art,” explains Jordan, Yung Jake’s real-life roommate and hype man. “He does things that people consider art, but it’ll make you laugh…I think he’s bridging the gap between the art world and the normal world.”

A perfect example of how Jake connects art to “the normal world” are his celebrity emoji paintings. Let that sink in for a minute, that the last three words of that sentence were written in correct order. It’s not a typo.

“Everyone likes emojis and everyone likes celebrities,” explains Yung Jake. “Seeing Larry David out of emojis, obviously it’s going to blow up. It’s fun to do. That’s why I do it. Cause I don’t like doing shit I don’t enjoy.”

“I make rap music. I make sculptures. Clothing. Awkward situations. Videos. For me and other people,” continues Jake. “I just try to have fun with everything. If I don’t enjoy doing it, I don’t want to do it…I feel like it’s wrong to show consumers something that you don’t have a passion [for].”

Yung Jake’s approach to art is at once nonchalant and complex, blasé and intentional, passive and aggressive. Who else would count making “awkward situations” as one of his mediums? He’s a dichotomy, a contradiction, a real piece of work. Everything he creates is done, more or less, for the fun of it, in a way that raises the question “is this art?”

The short answer, the only answer, is yes. It’s art. Get over it.

“If it makes you feel something, then it’s dope,” says Jordan, speaking of Yung Jake’s work. “Even if people find it disgusting or funny. If there’s a feeling attached to it, it’s dope.”

Yung Jake’s work evokes an emotional response, and one that’s appropriate to youth and Internet cultures. If the main purpose of art is to evoke an emotion from its audience, and Jake’s emoji paintings or immersive videos give his contemporaries a feeling of “dopeness,” then yes, it’s art. The work isn’t just cutting edge… it’s reinventing the knife.

“He’s making work that is living on the Internet,” says Steve Turner, owner and proprietor of the Steve Turner Gallery in Los Angeles. “It encompasses a lot, he’s kind of post-everything.”

Jake is making art out of the Internet and Internet culture, he’s taking content that is vapid and user generated and produced en masse and turning it into something that makes us think. He’s taking the “now” and creating the “next.” So, yes, celebrity emoji paintings might seem random and structureless, but maybe that’s where art is headed — the convergence of our modern obsessions.

“I think evil is structure,” says Yung Jake. “I want people to question…rigid structures and change them.”

And that single line might be the closest that Yung Jake will come to signifying a purpose in his work. He’s constantly talking about doing things because they’re fun, or because they’re natural, or because creating is simply his core function. For an artist who was born on the Internet, it makes sense that Jake is less concerned with cause and more concerned with effect.

Because Yung Jake isn’t going to break the Internet. He is the Internet.

Julia Louis Dreyfus, who did not particularly enjoy her time as a cast member on SNL, returned tonight to host the show for the third time since her stint as a regular.

Elaine Benes has some serious questions for Senator Sanders. #SNL @OfficialJLDhttps://t.co/gmNBRsih0b

— Saturday Night Live (@nbcsnl) April 17, 2016

In the cold open, she brought back her Seinfeld character, Elaine Benes, opposite Seinfeld co-creator (and George Constanza inspiration) Larry David as Bernie Sanders. In the sketch — a parody of last Thursday’s Democratic debate — Kate McKinnon’s Hillary Clinton and Larry David’s Bernie Sanders took questions from the audience, the first of whom was Elaine Benes, who is obviously a Hillary Clinton supporter. So much meta.

Yadda yadda yadda, it’s pretty … pretty … pretty good.

(Via SNL)

Now Watch: 10 Reasons You Should Be Impressed With Kate McKinnon’s Impressions

NBC

Larry David bumming around SNL has inspired some of the season’s best sketches and a blossoming relationship. Not between Larry David and shrugging (they’ve been going steady for decades), but the Curb Your Enthusiasm creator’s daughter and current SNL cast member Pete Davidson.

Unless you’re a big fan of Hannah Montana, you were probably introduced to Cazzie via her Instagram, where she takes the kind of photos you’d expect from someone who’s related to Larry David. Her “over it” face is pretty, pretty, pretty, pretty good. Also pretty, pretty, pretty, pretty good: Cazzie reportedly dating Davidson, according to Oh No They Didn’t, which adds, “No clue as to how long they’ve been dating but he and Carly Aquilino (the redhead from Girl Code) broke up last year.” Pete “may or may not have gotten tattoos for her.”

Imagine if you were dating Larry David’s daughter. Pete drives up to the house, rings the doorbell (that plays the Curb theme song, naturally), says “Hello Mr. David, how are you this fine evening?” No response. “I’m here to pick up Cazzie.” No response. “I’ll have her back by 11 p.m.” No response. “10 p.m.?” No response. “7 p.m.” No response. “Should I just leave?”

HBO

“…Okay.”

(Via Oh No They Didn’t)

Now Watch: 10 Reasons You Should Give Thanks For Hank Azaria

HBO

It’s no secret that Larry David — or at least the fictional version of Larry David presented in Curb Your Enthusiasm — is pretty, pretty, pretty bad at being chill when he needs to be. That’s why we love him. Who else would take people to task for minor infractions such as not picking up after one’s dog or messing with the cashew to raisin ratio in trail mix (what the hell were you thinking, David Schwimmer’s dad?). But while David represents all of the things we wish we could say to people who wantonly refuse to follow the minute rules that keep civilization functioning, there’s no way we could be like him in real life if we also intended to avoid stress heart attacks and attacks-by-strangers. So instead of following Larry David toward your certain doom, we’ve taken some of his most iconic fights from Curb Your Enthusiasm (which you can stream on HBO Now) and analyzed them to give you an idea of how to deal with them in real life.

So You Accidentally Broke An Acquaintance’s Glasses

HBO

How Larry handled it: In the second episode of season seven, David runs into his former neighbor, who he doesn’t recognize (or like) and compensates for it by hugging him so hard that he crushes the dude’s glasses with the herculean force of pretending to like him so no one catches feelings. But when the guy demands that Larry replace the glasses, David threatens to take the invoice he’s gonna get, tear it up into little pieces and pee all over them. When that doesn’t work, he calls the guy a moron and lets him know that he hates him and his dumb glasses. Fair.

How you should handle it: First, never hug. Especially when it’s someone you don’t recognize or someone you dislike. Instead, say hello politely, shake hands and then try to get out of there immediately. Pretend to use the bathroom or something, because no one’s going to question you about that.

If you do hug someone and you have broken something on the person’s body, you can deal with it in one of several ways: Apologize and then quickly wander off before they have a chance to process it, offer to pay for the damages (usually the offer is enough and no one will actually force you to), or gently agree that you’ll accept the invoice that they plan to send, then just don’t pay it.

And if it’s someone you already don’t like, their being angry with you shouldn’t be too much of a personal hardship. Just make sure to avoid them next time you see them. Let them seethe at your existence, they’ve earned that right.

You’ve Hired A Friend’s Significant Other And They’re Kind Of Awful

HBO

How Larry handled it: In season six, Larry hired his best pal Richard Lewis’ girlfriend for a receptionist job in his office. Unfortunately, Cha Cha (played by Tia Carrere) is very annoying (she always wants to talk after he leaves the bathroom!), and he kind of-sort of mentions it to Lewis. Of course, this leads to a fight in which Larry and Richard argue about who’s got the better-looking colon because that’s just what adults do. Hurt feelings all around and still no colon beauty pageant.

How you should handle it: If you’re going to get a friend’s significant other a job — don’t. Especially if you don’t know them that well. If you must help (and it happens), try to get them a job in a department that’s further away from you or help them make a connection with someone in a different office. Not only does this absolve you of responsibility, but it also stops awkward situations from happening if your friend and their significant other break up. It’s just common sense.

Your Pants Make It Look Like You Have A Hard-On When You Do Not

HBO

How Larry Handled it: In the very first episode of the show, Larry found that a pair of pants he owns were badly manufactured (unless they were advertised that way, because you never know what people like) and make it look like he has an erection when he doesn’t. Later he goes to the movie with his then-wife’s friend in the same pants and she thinks he’s got a thing for her. The awkwardness that ensues is so nail-biting that some people might have even stopped watching the show after watching Larry trying to talk his way out of this one.

How You Should Handle It: Don’t buy pants that make it look like you have a boner unless it’s what you’re specifically looking for. Try to sit down when you’re trying them on — that’s what that little seat/butt shelf is for. If you buy the pants and discover the problem later, return them. Or just wear them around the house and not in public. It’s your life, but here’s an important word of advice: there are lots of pants out there. You’ll find a pair just as comfortable and won’t have to explain how you don’t have a boner.

A Child Invites You To Permanently Alter The Appearance Of Their Favorite Plaything

HBO

How Larry handled it: Poorly. When a guy Larry’s trying to impress invites him to a party, Larry tries to make a good impression by helping the guy’s daughter out with a haircut for her special doll. Of course the result is disastrous and Larry has to steal a doll head from the child of his friend to replace the one he messed up, just so he can get his show on the air. Worse, even after Larry fixes the damn thing, he gets accused of being a pedophile because the kid gives him a hug while he’s got a bottle of water hidden in his pants (long story, don’t ask).

How you should handle it: Recognize that most small children have no idea what permanence is and are therefore fickle little monsters who will want things to go back to the way they were ten seconds after a change has occurred. Also, recognize that the parent of a child who is not your own will always appreciate you saying no and then inviting them to join the discussion before doing anything that might change their opinion of you. To you, a doll with a bad haircut might be a passing moment of annoyance. To a child who has just had their favorite thing in the world (for today) altered, it is an existential crisis. Just wait until they’re at least 14 before helping them with something like this.

When You Suspect Someone Is Well-Endowed In A Certain Area

HBO

How Larry handled it: If you’re a fan of the show, you know we’re talking about the Lisa episode. While Larry’s accusations (you have to watch this episode, seriously) weren’t unfounded, he got into a lot of trouble for discussing the anatomical dimensions of other people in mixed company.

How you should handle it: Never say anything ever. That’s it. There’s no other way.

When Michael J. Fox Is Your Upstairs Neighbor And You Believe He’s Doing Horrible Things To You And Blaming It On Parkinson’s

HBO

How Larry handled it: When Larry decided that Michael J. Fox, the beloved star of Back to the Future and Life With Mikey was punishing him for a perceived slight by using his Parkinson’s as a way to explain away all the horrible stomping and shaking of cans he was doing, he didn’t hold anything back. For this, he was reviled by his neighbors and eventually had to leave the city. That’s right: he had to leave an actual city. Don’t let this happen to you!

How you should handle it: First of all, resign yourself to the fact that some people are dicks even if they’re beloved by others (we both know there’s someone in your personal life whose appeal you just don’t understand) and recognize that you are powerless to stop it. You can hope that someday the truth will be exposed, or you can let it go. Under no circumstances, however, should you be the one to try and expose them for the villain they truly are. Especially if they are living with a debilitating illness/are going through ostensibly rough times that can be easily turned around to make it look like you’re a massive jerk.

The best way to deal with such a thing — if it’s a neighbor or co-worker — is to document instances of wrongdoing that you can then share with some large governing body very privately and without the need for recognition. But that’d be weird if it was a friend or a friend-of-a-friend, right? It might just be easier if you try to remember that some people just want to watch the world burn and you want to have no part in it. No doctor’s ever going to prescribe you enough Xanax to deal with all the stress this is causing, so move and hope for the best.

Getty Image

Curb Your Enthusiasm funnyman Larry David has a theory on what he believes may be helping Broadway hit Hamilton continue to garner success — just a case of white people trying to be “hip.” The comedian told Daily News columnist Mike Lupica on his podcast, The Mike Lupica Show, that many whites who have seen the play just want to “solidify their liberal bonafides” on Tuesday.

Created by Lin-Manuel Miranda, the musical infuses rap and hip-hop music as well as a multicultural cast to tell the story of Alexander Hamilton and his rise to power during the American Revolution. It’s one of the most popular plays on Broadway right now grossing 35 million dollars in ticket sales this year. David agrees that the play is “pretty amazing” but he thinks many whites don’t have any idea what is really going on through most of it.

“I have a feeling there are a lot of white people who are saying they are completely blown away even though they didn’t really understand half of the things the people on stage were saying. They just want to solidify their liberal bonafides and how cool they are: ‘Yeah, I love Hamilton. Yeah, I get it, I’m hip.’”

Who knows how much truth there is to David’s theory but Hamilton has already earned a Pulitzer Prize for drama and 16 Tony Award nominations — now that’s what’s pretty hip.

(Via New York Daily News)

Bernie Sanders will likely hang on to fight with Hillary Clinton until the Democratic National Convention this summer, but his time is likely shorter on SNL. To open the season finale of the show, Larry David returned to play Bernie Sanders one more time and it might turn out to be his final ride as the senator from Vermont.

Weirder things have happened in the past and Sanders might stick around in some capacity if he doesn’t manage to upset Hillary Clinton in some miraculous showcase, but it didn’t seem like the folks at SNL were taking many chances. David had a great run this season once comparisons started to be made between himself and Sanders, even sharing some screen time with the senator during his own hosting stint.

To cap it off, Sanders and Clinton shared a beer together in California before busting out into dance to the tune of Waltz of the Flowers from The Nutcracker. Kate McKinnon’s Clinton gets the last laugh in the end, doing what the real life Hillary has likely dreamed about at one point or another.

Here’s hoping that David at least gets a chance to return in the fall for just a short appearance or two. Maybe Sanders will end up with a cabinet position?

(Via SNL)

NBC

NBC is awfully fond of Maya Rudolph and is of the firm belief that you should be too. (Can you blame them? Maya Rudolph is a delight!) She’s been a fixture of the network on Saturday Night Live, Up All Night, and a one-off (well, sort of) variety show. Tuesday sees the series premiere of Maya’s new variety offering for the Peacock Network with Martin Short as her partner-in-crime, and it’s been revealed that the first episode of Maya & Marty will have an avalanche of guest stars. Bring on the informative tweet with comedic posing!

As you might expect from a Lorne Michaels produced offering, a few notable names are on tap for the debut of this shindig. Miley Cyrus, Larry David, Jimmy Fallon and human charm machine Tom Hanks will all be stopping by to do… um, something? They’ll be there. That’s the main thing.

NBC’s tried their luck at reviving the variety TV format before, because that’s apparently an unshakable fetish that television execs go wild for. (Thanks, the ’70s and early ’80s!) Will Maya & Marty succeed where last year’s much hyped Best Time Ever with Neil Patrick Harris failed? We may get our answer on Tuesday night.

(Via Vulture)

Did you catch last night’s celebrity-stuffed premiere of Maya & Marty? Of course you did, celebrities were there and you wouldn’t want to let them down by not watching at home, would you? One of the broadcast’s celebrity interactions featured Larry David having a friendly (well, maybe not that friendly) conversation with Martin Short’s uniquely named celebrity interviewer alter-ego Jiminy Glick.

Employing Glick’s hilariously grating approach to chatting with famous folk, it doesn’t take long for barbs to be volleyed back and forth. Glick goes full blowhard in dishing out his questions to the Curb Your Enthusiasm maestro and when David isn’t cracking up, he swings back at the man in the fat suit. Occasionally, there’s some talk about how going to the urinal was more fun when there weren’t urinal dividers. Y’know, the sort of hard-hitting journalism that 60 Minutes is too scared to touch.

“I wasn’t going to insult you!” exclaims the rotund interviewer as things get heated. “All I was going to say is that there’s a blandness to you that seems to be your trademark. And isn’t that wonderful? Now, how is that bad?”

In addition to backhanded compliments and fronthanded insults, the back-and-forth even gets physical. Well, as physical as Martin Short can be in that bulky Glick get-up. Give it a gander for yourself by checking out the video nestled above.

(via Vulture)

HBO

Larry David is a lot of things. Comedy great, co-creator of Seinfeld, creator and star of Curb Your Enthusiasm, (available to stream anytime on HBO Now). While he’s the master of the uncomfortable comedy moment, he’s also known for one notorious trait: he is a talker. Sometimes (most times) it does far more harm for him than good, but every so often, he’s able to use his ability to dig his way out of a hole, instead of burying himself deeper like he usually does. Should you find yourself needing to talk your way out of a bad situation, look no further than Larry David’s choice bits of wisdom.

“‘By sundown?’ What are you… what are you, Gary Cooper? ‘By sundown?’ What’s gonna happen?”

HBO

This is one of the most awkward instances you can find yourself in. Your best friend meets someone that they care about, and it turns out you two have already met, and you hate each other. Richard (Richard Lewis), the best friend in the situation here, does what he can to extend an olive branch between Larry and his new girlfriend. Larry, being Larry, is resistant to the idea of having to apologize. Still, Larry doesn’t want to totally blow Richard off, so instead he throws a little levity into the situation. Richard even admits that it’s fun, despite not wanting to laugh, proving that sometimes the best way to try and spackle over a slightly damaged friendship is with a little bit of good-natured humor.

“I guess I had a different plan for eternity. I thought… I thought I’d be single again.”

HBO

Not everyone dwells on the specifics of a phrase like ‘Til death do us part,’ but not everyone is Larry David. When it comes time for Larry and his wife, Cheryl (Cheryl Hines), to renew their vows to one another, her poetic musing of loving David well into eternity conflicts with his idea of how he’ll be spending the afterlife. On the surface, this may seem like one of those classic Larry David moments where he takes a bad situation and just keeps making it worse, but honestly, isn’t it better to get this all out in the open now, rather than in eternity? You never want an argument to linger.

“With all due respect, Officer Berg, you are not bald. You have chosen to shave your hair and that’s a look you’re cultivating in order to look fashionable, but we don’t really consider you part of the bald community… with all due respect.”

HBO

What’s key here is the first and last words Larry uses. He knows he’s dealing with a sensitive topic, asking for the spray-painted words “bald assh*le” on his door to be considered a hate crime. But Larry, in a move that is almost completely contrary to his usual grating persona, approaches things cautiously, and with a respectful demeanor in an effort to not piss off a cop. And while doing so, he’s even able to address the differences between being a bald man and being someone who shaves their head. It’s just top-notch diplomacy all the way around and a useful trait for anyone in a tough situation.

“The lunch in a normal American restaurant is very problematic for me. I don’t like to have hot food for lunch.”

HBO

No matter what your preferences are regarding lunch, no one wants it to be a bad time. Larry, being very particular about pretty much everything he eats (and does), is at least open and honest about these preferences. If you’ve got an issue with something, don’t hesitate to make it known. This way you’re not just talking your way out of a bad situation, but you’re avoiding one altogether.

“There might be an upside to this whole experience…”

HBO

There are your everyday bad situations, and then there are your ‘forget your lines in a broadway show on opening night’ situations. Regardless, Larry doesn’t seem bothered in the least, and starts a stream-of-conscious commentary on his uneven shaving technique, then decides to turn the whole thing into an impromptu standup set. It’s one of Larry’s finest moments as he not only keeps the audience from walking out but ends up saving the opening night performance and the play on a whole, much to Mel Brooks’ crushing disappointment.

“Pity points. That’s fabulous, I love pity points. But how can I get to a seven? I know a six is out of the question, but is there any way I can get to a seven?”

HBO

Once Larry ends up in the doghouse with Cheryl after their dinner with Gil (Bob Odenkirk), the former porn star, he asks her bluntly for the numerical ranking of exactly how angry she is. She gives him an 8.7, admitting that it was taken down from a nine due to him being screamed at, hence the aforementioned pity points. Larry, a realist through and through, isn’t shy about asking the chances of him getting the ranking down a bit further.

Proving that sometimes the best way to try and talk yourself out of a situation is simply to just ask. It might not work in getting you out of a bad scene, but at least you know that you tried.

HBO

Next month will mark the fifth anniversary of Curb Your Enthusiasm‘s last episode. And by I mean last, I mean the latest episode, since Curb hasn’t really ended officially. This is typical Larry David, “ehhhh” decision-making at its best. To him, bringing back his beloved show is like the character Larry making a decision on which pair of pants to buy, and that’s why we love him. But, his run as Bernie Sanders on SNL looks to be coming to a close, and even though he’s busy, maybe now is the time for the soon-to-be 69-year-old to get back on HBO to share his comic genius. His co-star JB Smoove seems to think it might be happening, finally.

He said as much on the Rich Eisen show.

“I call Larry every two weeks and I check on him because he’s old,” Smoove joked. “He’s busy, he’s a busy man so I always check on older people. No offense, Larry. So I check on Larry to make sure he’s good. I’ve been seeing him on SNL a lot, making sure he’s not over exerting himself. Just making sure that he’s good and not overly exerting himself.

So I called Larry like two weeks ago and I said, ‘Hey, Larry man.’ I just talk about regular stuff with him. It’s not always Curb stuff. But this time, aha! This time, he brought up Curb Your Enthusiasm. I don’t ever bring it up. He brought it up this time.”

David has said in the past that he might be down to make a Curb movie, and any fan would be willing to have that over nothing, but a final season to wrap up everything would be great. Just don’t stress the final episode, Larry. We know you don’t like them.

(Via Variety)